FIFA Feels Left Out of "Boot in Mouth" Week

A hoof, a shoe, and a leg... Things that Sepp Blatter puts in his mouth

I love it when Sepp Blatter gives interviews because every time he opens his mouth he proves beyond a reasonable doubt that he is a complete twat. This week (so far, he could still have a few things up his sleeves!) he made the shocking observation that football teams in England try to make money.

Whoa there Sepp, are you sure? I mean, either English teams are in debt up to their eyeballs and on the verge of collapse like you said last month or they are trying to make money by bringing in foreign talent and kicking English talent to the curb.You can’t have both!

Which is it? Actually, I don’t think he knows which of the two options are the right one and he’s just flailing around looking for anything to criticize England for because he’s a xenophobe and probably in the pocket of the Spanish and Italian giants of world football. You know, the clubs who supposedly eschew profits for the sake of playing beautiful football with 27 home grown players under rainbows and alongside unicorns.

Either that or this is yet another criticism that’s directed at Arsenal and only Arsenal. In his little quote he mentions two things that make me think this is him taking a swipe just at Arsenal: profitability and having only “one or two English players.” In my opinion, Sepp Blatter has an unhealthy obsessession with Arsenal. To the point where I have to wonder if he isn’t suffering from Neurosyphillis. All over the continent, racist fans and thugs are running wild and all King Sepp of Syphillis can focus on is how many Englishmen are in Arsenal’s first team. It’s really is bizarre behaviour and unbecoming of a man in his position.

Saying that the clubs in England are in it for the profits is pretty much the weakest argument I’ve ever seen from Blatter — and he’s had some real doozy’s. No, this is typical stuff from Blatter, he’s just thrashing around looking for some reason to hate on Arsenal football. You know it’s obvious when Richard Scudamore calls him out.

The only other story today that’s crazier than Sepp Blatter’s insane proclamation is the story that AC Milan is going to bid £35m for Adebayor. It might as well be £135m for all the likelihood that Arsenal will command that type of fee for the Togonator.

£35m would be an insane fee for any player in this economic climate, but £35m for Adebayor at a time when speculation is rampant that the Rossoneri are going to be cutting salaries 30% is, well, that’s Sepp Blatter insane.

Not to mention that in his current form I couldn’t see a team (except Tottenham) paying £16m for the player, much less a record transfer fee like £35m. And if you throw in the £15m for Clichy, that bring’s AC Milan’s total Arsenal haul to £50m! £50m, at a time when they are making cuts? I don’t understand how these fake stories get made up much less printed by “respectable” newspapers.

Anyway, £50m is a fun number to dream about. You know what Wenger could do with £50m? He could totally pay off some of the debt for the Highbury redevelopment scheme and still have some money left over for a couple of 16 year olds named Emmanuel!

That’s what.

See you lot tomorrow, when Sepp Blatter announces that English teams have too many Alsacian coaches and it’s effecting the English National team’s chances of qualifying for the World Cup.

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