Welcome to the 2016 article titled “why I hate Chelsea”

I started this blog in 2008 and every season since then, I have written about how I hate Chelsea.

I hate them for buying up all the talent from 2005-2012. I hate them for Jose Mourinho* and his faux masculinity and braggadocio, saying that he would like to punch Arsene Wenger in the face, proclaiming himself the “special one”, and calling Wenger a “specialist in failure” and a “voyeur”. I hate that they won the Champions League by playing anti-football with caretaker manager Roberto Di Matteo, proving Sam Allardyce’s assertion that if he were given a team that cost as much as Chelsea, even he could win the Champions League. I hate that they kicked lumps out of Arsenal in the League Cup final in 2007, causing three Arsenal players to lose their cool (Toure, Adebayor, and Eboue) and get red carded, while taking Cesc’s first trophy away from him. I hate that Chelsea’s entire philosophy since 2006 has been to kick lumps out of Arsenal, from Essien ruining Diaby’s knee to their current “bad boy” Diego Costa clawing Koscielny in the face and subsequently getting two Arsenal players sent off. I hate the fact that they took Arsenal academy player Ashley Cole and eventually took Cesc Fabregas, giving the latter the League title that Arsenal couldn’t.

Besides the footballing reasons, Chelsea have fans who have been filmed racially abusing a black man on a Paris subway, their captain was accused of racially abusing a fellow player, and their club has a history of violently racist fans. On the field and off the field, I hate Chelsea because they are easy to hate. But I mostly hate Chelsea because they win.

Other teams have horrible managers who talk nonsense, I don’t hate them. Other teams buy up all the players and I don’t hate them. If Chelsea bought Fabregas and Cole and they had failed, I would have just laughed. If a team kicks lumps out of Arsenal and loses, I pity them that that’s all they can do. If a team wins a trophy by playing anti-football, I don’t hate the team, I hate the tactic. All teams even have “bad boys” like Diego Costa, I hate those players, but I don’t hate the team. Other teams even win the Premier League title and I don’t hate them.

Point in case, Leicester played mostly anti-football last season, they have a player who committed a racism (just like John Terry, Chelsea captain), they won the League last season while Arsenal finished 2nd, and two of their players rejected moves to Arsenal this summer. But Arsenal beat Leicester twice last season – in two exciting matches with end to end action and fun football. I don’t hate Leicester.

My problem with Chelsea is that Arsenal have won just five times since 2004/05, and that is five only if I count the win in the Community Shield last summer. Meanwhile, Chelsea have won 18 times. And I guess I have 8 draws to cling to. Arsenal have won just five out of 31 matches. So, yeah, everything they do makes me hate them more.

But all of that anger and hatred is washed away when Arsenal get a win. When Arsenal beat them 5-3 in 2011 it was like a dream come true. There was Theo Walcott, sleepwalking through their back line and scoring the Arsenal third. That was followed by John Terry falling over as Robin van Persie rounded him and scored the fourth before adding a fifth a few minutes later.

We all hoped that was the turning point, that that win was the moment our nightmare ended, but it wasn’t. Arsenal haven’t won any League games since then, losing six of the last nine. And so from elation and hope, I’m back here to hate.

One of these days I’d like to hate Chelsea less.

Qq

*Don’t worry, when Arsenal face Jose Mourinho later in the year this post will be reworked and titled “why I hate Jose Mourinho”.

41 comments

  1. You summed up my reasons for hating them to a T. I would love Wenger to dominate them like we do to Tottenham but I can’t see it happening. Hopefully he proves me wrong starting tomorrow.

  2. Ebb and flow mates, ebb and flow.
    Look at geologic time, and it is 72-61-54.
    So, in essence, real close, but still hold the edge.
    Feel a flow comin’ on.

  3. Thought experiment. If it came to it, who would you rather come in second to? Chelsea, ManU or Spuds?

    1. Ugh. First of all, forever in our shadow, so never Spurs. Its really between Utd and Chelsea for me. If Jose was there I would have picked United without a doubt but Jose makes my skin crawl and I can’t stand the thought of him being happy. So I pick Chelsea till Jose is fired.

      1. Maybe it’s just because we beat them 3-0 but i’ve found that with Mourinho gone I dislike Chelsea a lot less. Conte seems like he’s okay.

        I couldn’t pick Spurs because of bragging rights and I couldn’t pick United because I hate both the club and the manager with a passion.

  4. In the absence of a superior talent, a superior , or at least adequate tactics need to be deployed.
    Unfortunately, Arsene Wenger hasn’t done that since Abramovich became the Chelsea owner and changed the power structure in the PL.

    The 6:0 drubbing at the Bridge was the clearest example of how a kamikaze tactics can undo a team.
    I had the misfortune to witness this massacre in person and I couldn’t believe seeing our left back, Gibbs, occupying at one point the position of the right winger during the opening minutes – crazy, crazy sh.t.

    Arsene Wenger, always the idealist.

  5. Nicely summed up Tim. My hatred for Chelsea runs pretty deep as well. Leicester was a good story last year in spite of all the other things and it’s hard not too feel some happiness for them. With Chelsea, the hatred has been brewing for a long time. We have been bullied on the pitch too many times. When our players retaliate, they either do something stupid or don’t get the call from the ref. Add to that all the charm of Mourinho and club captain John Terry, it’s too difficult not to hate them. I really hope we win tomorrow. It would go a long way in restoring some of my faith in the manager.

  6. The funny thing is I think we’ve lost to them many times due to our fear of losing to them. Mourinho would probably take two other losses than one loss to Arsenal/Wenger so he is also a big problem. I hope we beat his Man United at least once this season.

    1. It seems we have a mental block against them, the roots of which, I suspect, is bound to Wenger’s personal mental block vs. Maureen. He claims we have a mature team now. That, this is team of men and not boys. I hope we show that on the pitch.

  7. Yes, for all the reasons stated, I hate Chel$ki. But honestly, the thing I despise most in professional football, player, manager, club, governing body, agent, et al, is Mourinho. And besides a title for Arsenal, Wenger beating Mourinho is the thing I most want to see in football. But I’ll take beating Chelsea tomorrow to whet the appetite and kick start this season.

  8. So many reasons to hate Chelsea and so many covered in the post. Yet there are more. Another reason to hate them: The manager’s 1000th game at Arsenal.

  9. Hating a football team is such a luxurious indulgence. I hate chelsea too. Antonio Conte has been gracious so far, I hope to hate them a little less from tonight.

    Xhaka couldn’t, could he? 3 screamers in 3?

    1. Yet another reason to hate Chelsea:actually hiring Italian managers with class like Ancelotti then sacking them after delivering trophies. Conte will no doubt go through the revolving door in a season or two.

  10. Appropo that a racist club would have an an owner from a country where the problemof racism is so systemic and endemic.

  11. Twenty years old, fearless, creative, visionary and possesses a goal threat. How much is Alex Iwobi worth on the transfer market? What a find. Please note… he ALWAYS plays, whatever personnel changes there are elsewhere. Astonishing rise.

    1. The genes, my man, the genes! Iwobi was born to play. His father was a footballer in Nigeria in the seventies before emigrating to the UK to study and practice Law. And you already know that Alex himself is the nephew of the ultimate “skill workshop”, Jayjay Okocha.

  12. We so, so needed that.

    YESSS!

    Not only have we lost to this team for years, we have failed score against them – not a single goal since 2013.

    The Kings of London have finally arisen.

    Long live The Arsenal.

  13. before i open my 4th beer of the day, let me just say how sweet that victory felt. wenger has this group of players playing like a proper team. i really hope we don’t get derailed by injuries again. i want the fastest possible recovery for coquelin. we are all clamoring for xhaka to start but the reason why it was so easy for xhaka today is because coquelin was a big part of the 2 nil lead we had before xhaka got on the pitch.

    in a day where every arsenal player can be proud of themselves, i have to give the man of the match to theo. his industry at both ends of the pitch was exemplary and the goal he scored was one of the best team goals i have ever seen.

  14. BTW did any one catch Mustafi’s celebration after the 3rd goal? And by celebration I mean pulling gently on Ozil’s ear… I almost pee’d my pants laughing

  15. That was so sweeeeeeeeet. Sitting with Manure boys on a Saturday evening who wanted us to draw.. buhahahahahahaha.. and ozil you beauty.. so proud of the boys.. just hope this is the start of bigger things to come..
    London is red again.. #CYOG

  16. Coqzorla was brilliant today. They have found their groove the last matches. Last year the injury would have been an end to our title challenge. Now we could put on Xhaka. But I Hope Coquelin is back soon. Wenger got everything right. The front four was Great. And Mustafi and Koz had their best performance so far. And the midfield ticked. So I will not complain about playing Giroud over Peres. Even if Xhakas throughball to Giroud probably would have resulted in a goal for a faster forward. Wenger knows what he is doing.

  17. The real Arsenal stood up for the first time this season. High octane passing, high intensity movement, clinical finishing, and smothering team defense. So beautiful was this match that I could weep for joy.
    Let’s face it, I’ve been watching Man City, Pool, Dortmund just rolling over teams with their effort and until today, I hadn’t seen Arsenal play at their level this season.
    MOTM: Walcott. That’s right, Walcott. In truth, their many who could have qualified: Özil, Sanchez, Bellerin, Monreal, Koscienly, Mustafi, etc.
    No drama from Costa today.
    No drama from Oliver today.
    Cahill had his John Terry moment for our first from Sanchez.
    The only blot was Cech’s wayward kicking to the sidelines.
    We needed this win to stay above Man U and not lose touch with the table toppers.

    1. Let me not forget Iwobi who is playing well beyond his years.

      Now Arsenal cannot let up against lower table teams and think they can just put in a shift against the top end teams.

  18. A great performance. As Wenger put it, Style and Steel. While it’s true we’ve not often played like that before, the truth is also that we haven’t ever really been allowed to before. So many of our tackles would’ve been called fouls before. Good refereeing can make so much difference.

    Hope Coquelin is ok. That was basically the only negative of the match. Twice also we had mixups and allowed Chelsea in. But one of them led to a Cech one on one save (and haha Batshuayi) and the other led to one of those moments that will stay in the memory with Bellerin blindsiding Pedro with his ‘pace’.

    Walcott put in so much effort. Whenever he lost the ball, he was racing back to win it back, and usually did. Iwobi was better on defense too (and Monreal screamed at him when he wasn’t) Oziltekkers was fun. Alexis as CF works now that the team has adjusted to him. Putting Giroud on at the end was a smart move to get the players to adjust to using that option as well. I was also pleased with how we adapted once Chelsea switched their system. Walcott’s goal was a great team move and the sort of football we love to watch.

    Is Wengerball back? I think it might be, but further tests await.

  19. now that the cunty one is at old Trafford, my hatred for Chelsea has lessened tbh… they are my 4th most hated team after spuds,united, Liverpool and then chelsea i guess

    1. I find it hard to really hate Liverpool. Since i’ve been following football they’ve mostly tried to play football in the right way and their managers have mostly been okay. I’m sure if they actually started winning stuff I’d change my mind.

      Stoke though..

  20. Thoroughly enjoyable win yesterday. I hope that stops all the negativity for a bit.

    Just thought I’d mention a couple of things about how the first 6 games have shaped the table after taking my first look at how things are shaping up:
    Man City beat Manure … but apart from that, the highest team they’ve played is Bournemouth (i.e they’ve played 5 of the bottom 7 teams!). So, perhaps less surprising that their start has been so strong
    Spuds have won 4, but 3 were against 3 of the bottom 6 and the 4th was Palace at the start of the season before they picked up.
    Everton have won 4 but all against mediocre opposition, including the bottom two
    Liverpool look strong though, having beaten Leicester & Chelsea … the game against us too although my view is that it was a special case given the preparation issues we had.
    Manure, jury out. But beaten by Watford, who we beat easily.

  21. Really proud of the team. We often throw around terms about which player “ran” the game, but Ozil and Cazorla genuinely dominated proceedings in the first half particularly. Chelsea’s ageing back four couldn’t cope with the speed of our play and each player performed his function in the side extremely well. It was a total team effort. Putting this game in conjunction with Chelsea’s last match vs. Liverpool creates a troubling pattern for them: unable to cope with a high press, not athletic enough to defend against quick forwards, and unable to transition effectively through midfield. Their best pass of the game against us came when David Luiz pushed forward and broke two lines of defense to put Batshuayi through 1 v 1 vs. Cech. As for us, we have our own pattern as well. Since grinding out results against Southampton and PSG, we have scored 11 goals while conceding only 1 in three matches. This run of results doesn’t mean we are perfect by any means or that the problems that cropped up through the first few games are gone completely, but it is a marked uptick in form which bears closer analysis.

    1) Alexis settling into the CF role: Through 6 games, Alexis has scored 4 goals from his new position. Not a bad return for his first month in a new role. Squawka stats show he is taking fewer shots from outside the box and his shooting accuracy has improved to 67% compared to 54% last season. He is actually taking fewer shots (3.3 vs 4) but scoring more goals from those shots, probably a result of better shot selection and better opportunities which come from playing further forward. Although he often brings others into play, he is completing fewer passes and fewer key passes than last season suggesting that Wenger is not grooming a false 9 of him. Although his work rate leading the press from the front is tremendous, it’s notable that he no longer is asked to track his fullback; as a result, all his defensive metrics are down with the obvious return being seen in his goals record.

    2) Theo Walcott getting involved in both phases: Walcott seems to be even more selective with his shooting this season, with a quite outrageous 79% accuracy thus far, and although his offensive output is above career averages thus far what stands out both with the naked eye and in the numbers is his willingness and appetite for tracking back compared to previous seasons. He is making 1.9 tackles per game compared to just 0.4 last season (though he played as CF in some games last season as well).

    3) Improved defensive gameplan: We’ve given away only two shots on target in each of our past two PL fixtures for a combined 0.9 xG, the same as against Southampton and compare to 3.4 vs. PSG (@caley_graphics). Oxlade-Chamberlain for Walcott was the only change from the XI that lined up vs. PSG and the one for Chelsea, so what was the difference? Judging from their heatmaps, Coqulein and Cazorla played further forward, closer to their forwards and in particular to Ozil for more of a front foot approach. Ozil-Cazorla was the #1 pass combination against Chelsea, compared to Mustafi-Koscielny against PSG. As a team, we only dispossessed PSG twice, compared to 8 times against Chelsea (and crucially, for the opener). The emphasis was clearly to play a more unified pressing game and it worked well. I would credit Liverpool as well for showing how vulnerable Chelsea can be under a high press.

  22. They’re good points.
    I’m used to it at this stage but it’s not surprising to hear all the usual talk about how great everyone is…except Arsenal.

    As you say everyone is quick to praise City, and while they’ve played well for sure, most of the teams they’ve played have been towards the bottom of the table.

    I heard a commenter gushing about how many goals Liverpool have scored so far, and sure they’ve scored a lot of goals, but we’ve still a better goal difference and away from home they’ve a goal difference of zero.

    We’ve had some tough games and the only disappointing result so far has been the Liverpool one. Apart from that, results wise, we’ve done well.

    It’s early in they season and there’s lots of reasons to be optimistic.

  23. the coquelin injury happened in a challenge identical to the one cesc suffered in a challenge in the ’08-’09 season with xabi alonso. cesc went into that challenge half-assed while alonso went straight through cesc and he was out for 3-4 months. when you’re seated making a challenge like that against someone standing and going in that hard, there’s only ever going to be one winner. it wasn’t that kante was dirty or malicious. he needed to be strong and he was. i hope coquelin will be back quicker than cesc was.

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