FIFA Feels Left Out of "Boot in Mouth" Week

A hoof, a shoe, and a leg... Things that Sepp Blatter puts in his mouth

I love it when Sepp Blatter gives interviews because every time he opens his mouth he proves beyond a reasonable doubt that he is a complete twat. This week (so far, he could still have a few things up his sleeves!) he made the shocking observation that football teams in England try to make money.

Whoa there Sepp, are you sure? I mean, either English teams are in debt up to their eyeballs and on the verge of collapse like you said last month or they are trying to make money by bringing in foreign talent and kicking English talent to the curb.You can’t have both!

Which is it? Actually, I don’t think he knows which of the two options are the right one and he’s just flailing around looking for anything to criticize England for because he’s a xenophobe and probably in the pocket of the Spanish and Italian giants of world football. You know, the clubs who supposedly eschew profits for the sake of playing beautiful football with 27 home grown players under rainbows and alongside unicorns.

Either that or this is yet another criticism that’s directed at Arsenal and only Arsenal. In his little quote he mentions two things that make me think this is him taking a swipe just at Arsenal: profitability and having only “one or two English players.” In my opinion, Sepp Blatter has an unhealthy obsessession with Arsenal. To the point where I have to wonder if he isn’t suffering from Neurosyphillis. All over the continent, racist fans and thugs are running wild and all King Sepp of Syphillis can focus on is how many Englishmen are in Arsenal’s first team. It’s really is bizarre behaviour and unbecoming of a man in his position.

Saying that the clubs in England are in it for the profits is pretty much the weakest argument I’ve ever seen from Blatter — and he’s had some real doozy’s. No, this is typical stuff from Blatter, he’s just thrashing around looking for some reason to hate on Arsenal football. You know it’s obvious when Richard Scudamore calls him out.

The only other story today that’s crazier than Sepp Blatter’s insane proclamation is the story that AC Milan is going to bid £35m for Adebayor. It might as well be £135m for all the likelihood that Arsenal will command that type of fee for the Togonator.

£35m would be an insane fee for any player in this economic climate, but £35m for Adebayor at a time when speculation is rampant that the Rossoneri are going to be cutting salaries 30% is, well, that’s Sepp Blatter insane.

Not to mention that in his current form I couldn’t see a team (except Tottenham) paying £16m for the player, much less a record transfer fee like £35m. And if you throw in the £15m for Clichy, that bring’s AC Milan’s total Arsenal haul to £50m! £50m, at a time when they are making cuts? I don’t understand how these fake stories get made up much less printed by “respectable” newspapers.

Anyway, £50m is a fun number to dream about. You know what Wenger could do with £50m? He could totally pay off some of the debt for the Highbury redevelopment scheme and still have some money left over for a couple of 16 year olds named Emmanuel!

That’s what.

See you lot tomorrow, when Sepp Blatter announces that English teams have too many Alsacian coaches and it’s effecting the English National team’s chances of qualifying for the World Cup.

8 Comments on FIFA Feels Left Out of "Boot in Mouth" Week

  1. FYI: The Russian WCQ is on FSC tomorrow morning – so we can all watch Mother Goose run Arshavin into the ground.

  2. Sepp Blatter and Platini are both morons. I don’t know how they get elected – I suppose in the FA and UEFA it’s just stupid voting for stupid. His whole 6+5 proposition is not only illegal but also an admission, especially for England that their players are garbage. Clubs find the best of the best no matter their nationality – in most cases that doesn’t seem to be the English. Of the major 4 leagues i.e. German, English, Spanish, Italian. The english league is perhaps by far the only one in which a majority of the top four clubs don’t have domestic talent. I’m fairly certain the big clubs of the other leagues are littered with players from that country. It simply boils down to the FA being piss poor at running successful youth academies. It stands to reason that if the FA had half a clue how to manage the English youngsters to be able to have a more continental style football they could be playing in top teams. However, it is my understanding that many academies haven’t evolved very much since the old days of long ball tactics and muscle bound defending. The game has changed into a more graceful game where player finesse is key, not brute force. The problem is that there are probably old fogies from back in those days of typical English football training these English youngsters. The top four in the Prem are not managed by Englih managers so they bring a very different style of play to their clubs which, by their player selections, is not a style many English players can be successful at. Conversely, most, if not all, of the clubs fighting relegation have an English manager and most play the typical English style – coincidence? I think not.

    Additionally, why do Enlgish players with a third of the talent of other players from other countries cost five times more? Theo is without a doubt talented but if he wasn’t English he wouldn’t have cost us 12M. If he was French, from Ligue 1 and from say Metz you better believe he’d go for less than 10M. Clubs are businesses and player talent being equal, they will bid for the cheaper player. It is the FA’s responsbility to oversee the academy development to a standard as those of other countries. There are no comparatively famous English youth academies like there are Marseille, Ajax, Parma etc. There are some good ones like Man City or perhaps Boro, but when you consider the number of top class players from the Marseille or Ajax youth ranks to Man City or Boro the English academies get blown out of the water.

  3. WC, I think one of the reasons English players are worth more is that they generate more revenue for the club. Theo sells more shirts and stuff than most of the rest of the team even though they are equal in talent. For example, Theo, Cesc, and van Persie already have their names ready to be pressed onto shirts but someone like Eduardo has to be hand spelled. Anecdotal evidence certainly but I think it fits.

    If he goes on to become an England star, Arsenal will reap huge benefits in merchandising from young English folks who want to “be like Theo.”

    I think that’s at least part of the logic!

  4. I am not so sure if English players sell the most T-shirts and bring the most revenue. I would argue that on a global level the foreign players sell more shirts. I will be very impressed if Walcott ever sells the amount of shirts that Henry or Bergkamp did. I think the main reason why English players get more money is pure xenophoebia – but it’s also a way for clubs to keep the media on their side. Just look at amount of negative press Arsenal receives compared to the other big clubs. I really dont see any reason other than the fact that Liverpool has Gerrard, Chelsea has Lampard & Terry and Man U has Rooney & Ferdinand. If we had an English figurehead at our club, I’m pretty certain we’d have a lot more media “pundits” on our side. The problem is two fold however. English players somehow think they deserve more money because they are Englishmen playing for English clubs and in turn the clubs cater to their whim for favorable media bias.

    I agree Blatter and Platini and both useless fools. They really should be thinking of ways to make the game more fair instead of trying to circumvent EU laws so other leagues can catch up with the EPL. It’s pathetic.

    I wouldn’t mind the international breaks so much if there were at least some good games on. FSC is showing Iran vs Saudia Arabia, Slovenia vs. Czech Rep and, Russia vs. Azerbaijan and Japan vs. Bahrain. GOOD GRIEF! It’s the who’s-not-who list of world football. At least GOL TV is showing Spain vs. Turkey and France vs. Scotland so I wont be totally deprived of good football this w/e.

  5. Tim, how can the president of FIFA be a xenophobe and still function? He probably runs into a hundred non-Swiss people a day; unless he hides under his desk all day, it’s pretty hard not to run into foreigners you’re in charge of the third biggest international organization in the world. Blatter maybe many different shades of entertaining, but he’s not xenophobic.

    And I’d like to think quite a lot of the world shares an anti-English prejudice. After all, the first alliance in Europe was an anti-English one between France and Scotland. Half the world fought wars to kick the English out of their countries. And the only reason Australia’s still part of the Empire is so we can beat them in sports every now and then.

  6. Connolly,

    Xenophobia can be specific (Americans hate Mexico, e.g.) or general (French hate everyone, e.g.) Blatter certainly hates the English, it’s the only explanation for his insanity.

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