Live-blogging Arsenal v. Hull — part 1, enter the Stoke.

I did some “liveblogging” last season as a test but I didn’t have anywhere near the audience then as I do now, so I thought I’d give it a whirl again and see what the response is. I’ll be honest and say that the real impetus behind these is that since I write the blog in a half a day away different time zone the news stories generally dry up by Saturday morning and I’m left with just a few dregs.

So… without further ado.

7:50am the Stoke v. Chelsea game is at a break and none too soon, Chelsea is up 1-0 off an own goal. This is like watching a root canal.

7:55am ha ha, my daughter is crying, probably because she just realized that Arsenal don’t play for an hour and a half. Or maybe she just learned that Thomas Rosicky’s magical mystery illness is causing all Arsenal fans great consternation.

8:03am Fox Soccer Channel is so low rent… they never tell who the commentators are (I wanted to look up this English guy’s name so I could see why he was chosen to represent anything much less Football in America) and just now as they went to break they were announcing their sponsors and couldn’t even get the sound right so the American dude was drowned out by their closing music.  Plus, the commercials are funny. Thomas Kinkade paintings of NASCAR? Who do they think is watching this, the Beverly Hillbillies?

8:09am Chelsea are hurting people, again.

8:10am mmmm… Raspberry pancakes, thanks babe, you rock!

8:15am these pancakes are awesome, and hey look at Chelsea fouling and cheating and wasting time: they’re so classy.

8:20am Stoke’s 8’11” stiker is giving Chelsea all kinds of problems. I’d be so stoked if they equalized.

8:25am It’s called “NASCAR THUNDER!!!” and I give it 4 whore diamonds.

Thomas Kinkade Gallery of Horrors
Thomas Kinkade Gallery of Horrors

8:35am Stoke is making a game of this, but you just know that Lampard or Dogbag are going to get a second goal.

8:37am Disgusting, Anelka lashes in a goal after a shockingly poor clearance by Faye.

8:43am disgusting, the announcer just said “John Terry… sheer brawn.”

8:50am sorry, this game is deader than corduroy so I was just geeking out on stats. Did you know that Frank Lampard had 60 shots in the EPL last year and only scored 10 goals? HA HA PROFLIGATE! Come on ref, blow the whistle…

8:55am I agree Matt, but Lady Liberty is currently living with her abusive boyfriend in a trailer park in Tennesee, and she’s all corpulent from downing a fifth of Jack and a handful of pills every day.

Thank god, that game ended.  Ok, I’ll be back in a second with the actual Arsenal thread.

What are you guys still doing over here? Go to the Arsenal thread already!

2 Comments on Live-blogging Arsenal v. Hull — part 1, enter the Stoke.

  1. “Thomas Kinkade paintings of NASCAR?” – Oh man, I am going to have to look for that ad. Actually most of the ads on FSC are pathetic.

    Did you see the studs-up tackle by Davies in the first half? He’s a menace.

  2. That painting is hilarious. I love the fighter jets streaking over the track – nice touch there, Tommy. All you need now is a naked Statue of Liberty beating the shit out of bin Laden in the pit area. America and NASCAR!! FUCK YEAH!

    Man Chelsea is BORING…

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