Give me a sign

Arsene Wenger has ridden to the defense of Eboue. It’s a toss up, which players do fans like to whip more: Eboue, Senderos, Gallas, or Adebayor? For me, hands down, it’s Eboue.  I can’t stand him.  But recently I’ve started to see why the boss plays him; because he provides extra defense on a team that plays so many players forward.  Frankly, I came to that realization this year while watching him plague Gerrard and I have to admit, I was sort of wrong about the guy.  He’s not a great forward, he’s not even a decent forward, but he is a great defender and his work rate is top notch.  If you team him up with Sagna in the back, you can sort of see what the boss wants to do.  Maybe he can work on his crosses.  Maybe he can develop a shot (I don’t think he has the instinct for it).  Maybe maybe maybe.  For now, the boss is happy with what Eboue provides the team.

You don’t always play a player because he scores goals, you play him because he gives you a balance to the team. We play in a very attacking style and Eboue gives us defensive balance

Right.  Defensive balance.  Go it.  I don’t think it’s his lack of goals though that REALLY bugs the average Arsenal supporter; it’s the play acting, fakery, getting stretchered off the pitch, insanely stupid fouls, and disgusting post foul genuflection that really, REALLY gets the fans pissed off.  I don’t care if he never scores a single goal.  I’d like him 1000X better if he stopped acting like such a C*NT.

What happens next is truly unbelievable: Wenger kind of has a syphilitic moment and compares Eboue to Ray Parlor.  Uhhh… let’s just leave it at “defensive balance” shall we?  Also, could you teach him how to put in a proper cross?  And while you’re at it, could someone please teach him to stop acting like such a C*NT?

The Poop Scoop:

Signings are imminent.  Any moment now I’m going to open up my news feed and see a hundred signings.  The whole team is going to be swept clear and the boss is going to start all over — which is the only way that I think he’ll make all the fans happy.

Well, maybe he’ll just clear out everyone except the striker position.

Moving to quash the minute-by-minute rumors that Arsenal are signing a striker, Wenger has revealed that Carlos Vela is expected to play up front, and will get Arsenal first team action next year.  Before you get too excited and say “he’s a natural replacement for Hleb on the left wing!” take these words from the Prof:

He has played the whole season at Osasuna on the left wing and he had to work hard there. But for me it is not his position he is a central striker, an Eduardo type.

Another goal poacher, which is just fine with me because the way Arsenal play they need 10 poachers on the pitch at all times.  At least, that’s just about the only way I can see the Arsenal fans being happy.

But seriously, Eduardo is not expected to make a full recovery until December and so some cover there will be nice.  There are a lot of questions about Vela (like “can a slight 19 year old fill Eduardo’s shoes?) but  Wenger seems to rate the kid highly so, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

Speaking of signing players who are already under contract; Arsenal are working on extending Clichy’s contract.  Good for him, good for the club, good for the fans, I’d hate to see a player of his immeasurable talent pull a Flamini on the club.

And that’s pretty much it for signings today.

You could count the “signing” of Stan Kroenke to the Arsenal board if you really want.  It’s actually far more remarkable than the signing of Clichy if you think about it.  Just last year Peter Hill-Wood said he “didn’t want his sort” and now he’s saying thinks like:

Contrary to what I said before, I now believe he [Kroenke] may have a vital contribution to make to the future of this club. I’m not denying I said what I said, but I made those observations before meeting Stan. I have now got to know him and I have changed my opinions.

I think PH-W took one look at the alternative (Usmanov) and decided that he did actually like his sort.  I know I have softened on Kroenke since Usmnanov put his fat fingers in the pie so it shouldn’t surprise anyone that the board has softened now too.  Facing a hostile takeover by a convicted criminal sometimes makes people re-evaluate their situation.

That’s it for today, unless there’s a real signing or something.

P.S. Arsenal are signing Tarzan Puyol.  It’s true!  Never mind that he doesn’t fit the need (he’s too short, too old, and would cost an arm and 2 legs) Arsenal are chasing after him!