2 eggs, 2 bacon, 2 toast, 2 c*nts

There isn’t any team news to report today. You already know that Arsenal are traveling with 14 players, all of which are injured. You also know that Wenger is keeping team selection close to his vest with only Lehmann assured of a starting spot (watch Fabianski start). So, what’s left to talk about?

Hmm, I’m having bacon and eggs with the girls. Yep it’s a 2 egg, 2 bacon sandwich. I’m also watching Liverpool struggle against Barnsley. I actually know a Barnsley supporter, which is odd here in America, where everyone is Irish and supports Man U or Litterpool. So I guess I’m going for Barnsley.

What else? Oh yeah! Sepp Bladder and Alisher Usmanov reminded the world that they are fat cunts! First, just when you thought that Sepp Blatter was on your side as a fan he reminds everyone that he’s for strict affirmative action…with hard quotas! If there are any Brits who read this, you might not know what affirmative action is (HEY! Barnsley just equalized!) so let me explain. Affirmative action was the system here in America whereby if you had two applicants of equal qualifications, a business might hire the minority applicant based on the fact that his/her minority group had been historically dispossessed. So, it was a way for America to try to make up for slavery… and Jim Crow… and the racism that still exists in America. But whatever you think of Affirmative Action and its efficacy, the one thing that it never did was have quotas. Because even here in America, the land that pretends to be about fairness and justice and especially fancies itself as a meritocracy when nothing could be further from the truth, we knew that quotas were unfair and would lead to hiring of less qualified and in some businesses highly unqualified personnel. Which is exactly what Septic Bladder is saying he wants. He wants to force teams to have 6 people on the pitch who have the correct passport.

Thankfully, it’s just Blatter taking the piss because there’s no court in the world that would uphold a quota system. So, good ole Sepp is just reminding us that while he occasionally might say or do something that we agree with, deep down, he’s a despicable cunt.

In other cunty news, Usmanov has purchased more shares. Fuck. I had hoped this plan had died. Maybe of a massive coronary. Or maybe it had choked on a sandwich. But it looks like Fatty Alisher is still intent on buying Arsenal. I think we can only hope that this plan keels over maybe of polonium poisoning… sooner rather than later.

All right, that’s it for today. I’ve got some kind of FA cup match, followed by “old men playing football” practice, followed by beer.

Until tomorrow!